Friday, August 13, 2010

Panic (or perhaps nesting?)

I think I've officially realized that I'm panicking just a bit about the baby coming.

Two nights ago I dreamed that I went into labor, and I hadn't packed my bag for the hospital. But, in my dream, I didn't care that I hadn't packed my bag for the hospital. I panicked because I hadn't packed a bag for Ella to take to whoever would be watching her. It is funny how priorities change after having the first child!

I'm also a bit panicked because I haven't cleaned Ella's old car seat for baby brother. It is out in the shed, and even though it is wrapped up, I need to wash the fabric part and wipe down all the plastic parts.

I also realized that I don't really have any clothes for the baby yet (other than a few little things here and there). I'm honestly not even sure if they are newborn size clothes or not. And, up until last night, we did not have any diapers for him either.

I'm also panicked a bit about their room not being ready.

I'm also panicked because the house is a mess (I've got to get back in my Flylady routine - I'll admit that while things have been better than they used to be regarding keeping my house in order, I've still been slacking some there). I don't want to come home from the hospital to a messy house, but I also don't want people coming (even my family) to visit to a messy house. Why do I care if my house is clean now if the baby still isn't due for more than a month? I don't know, but in my head my house should be clean now!

I'm not due until the end of September (approximately 6 1/2 weeks away) so I shouldn't be panicking too much . . . although Ella came a week and half early if that even means anything.  On top of my paranoia, everyone keeps asking me when I'm due. When I tell them the end of September, they respond with a shocked expression and say something along the lines of "oh, I thought you were due much sooner than that." Do I really look that big? Of course, if you ask my husband, he'll say I'm really due the first week of October (I've been measuring a week behind my entire pregnancy).

I've decided that all this panic is just a bizarre form of nesting. Hopefully I can use this "panic" to my advantage and check a bunch of things off my to-do list this weekend!